Coachella line-up = bush league bullshit

Whoa and WTF? Right now I feel like we the people have been hosed. This years Coachella lineup seems way below average to me and a lot of other angry/disappointed concert-goers right now. Apparently another couple of big bands are still in the works, but c'mon Golden Voice is this all you have for us right now? It seems as if whoever did the booking was just extremely lazy or got an extremely late start this year. I will not accept that this festival has jumped the shark already. Its just normally I look at the list each year and get very fired up and I really can't say that about most of these bands this year. Now, don't get me wrong, its not horrible by any stretch, but its just not very exciting. Tool as a headliner is just insulting. Where are all the new bands that will be at SXSW? Don't the Arctic Monkeys seem like a logical choice to be playing ? Do I really need to see Bloc Party again right now? The only really acts that I'm really interested in seem to be My Morning Jacket, Gnarls Barkley, Wolf Parade, Dangerdoom and maybe Seu Jorge. Couldn't they have booked the Silver Jews? Or Supergrass? The Raconteurs, anyone? That would have made some sense. I feel like I could go on and on right now, but I'll stop. I'm sure the weekend will still be amazing, I'm just not sure how much time I'll be spending at the Polo Fields.

WOLF PARADE TICKETS JUST WENT ON SALE FOR APRIL 9TH AND 10TH AT WEBSTER HALL. I JUST POOPED MY PANTS!

Thank You, New York!!!

It was with these words that Rachel Shapiro exited the stage after making her fantastic Mercury Lounge debut with hometown and TPM favorite, Sam Champion. Although now suffering from what can only be called "tambourine arm" she did indeed rock the house as evidenced by some of these pictures. Everyone in attendance would agree that it was worth the injury. Overall, it was a fantastic birthday night: multiple barfings, deviled eggs, smacked heads and keeping it not so smooth.

Popping Pills at the Table is Fair Game for a Post - Deal with it!

Remember that post I wrote about a certain C-List celeb with far too many problems to even list???? Well yesterday I deleted it due to some backlash I received about it. At first I felt really bad that I had offended someone but as the day wore on I realized I was merely following in the footsteps of gawker, defamer, pink is the new blog, US Weekly, etc. Celebrities are fair game, no matter who they are, and if anyone has a problem with that then they don't have to read this blog. Or we can throw down on the corner of first and first. Holla!

I Bet You Looked Good On The Dance Floor

While Shaps and Del will have a full re-counting of her birthday weekend- including amazing shots of my girl on-stage with Sam Champion beating the tamborine like it was nobody's bidness and my girl Jamal puking her brains out and falling so hard she bruised the opposite side of her head- I just want to say one thing....

THANK GOD FOR DR. DIAMOND DAVE!

This young doctor from Park Slope via Austin via Houston turned what could have been a lackluster saturday evening into one of the most rockingest weekend nights in a long time. While standing outside the mercury lounge waiting to get into The Big Sleep/Field Music show, Dr. Dave boldly did the mc hammer for mere and me and seemingly didn't stop until we left him and his friend- who I like to call Quietly Witty John- at No Malice Palace around 4a.

So Dr. Diamond Dave.... call us... we need some more grinding action. I don't have a pic of him, but this one of Crashers will suffice.. you get the idea.

Oh and has anyone seen this 80s movie "Just One of the Guys"? watched it yesterday- worst acting ever + breast baring = totes awes flick.

Yet Another TPM Birthday!

Even though Koko's dead as shit....
Don't forget to wish my favorite gal a happy birthday today!

Looks like the afterparty tonight (1/27) will be at Fontana's (Eldridge btwn Broome and Grand)- around 12:30a- whoa, yeah, late night!

BREAKING NEWS

This just came through the news desk:

Work It Out Productions will acquire controlling interest in the troubled media outlet Bring It Down Productions sources say. WIOP executives could not be reached for comment, but it's been reported that former BIDP president Kathy Reilly will become part of the new organization.

A representative for BIDP said on speakerphone "It's not our money" and "I don't understand" before slamming the phone down with a very loud "OOOOOOOOKKKKKAAAAAYYYYYYYYYY"

TPM PARTY... well sort of

We are still debating as to where the festivites will end up after the show. Any ideas are welcome. One thing we do know- 3a dance-off at Orchard Bar.

Quick'ins.

Just a quick note:
I'll never look at The Mercury Lounge the same way again after Friday's Editors show. Let's just say the amount of fist-pumping and over the head clapping that ensued should keep my batwings in shape for months to come. Best show i've ever seen there. period.

And Kev wants me to let you know that there are 2 new songs available to download for Foreign Born here: http://myspace.com/foreignborn.

This Just In...

...from Chrashton:
we are scientists make me want to leave work go chug sparks out of a beer bong and dance out the roof of a hummerzine

And in relation to Del's post below- I'd like to send a shoutout to Neil who so efficiently got us a swinging pad for the big fest in the west. Just imagine our buff tan bodies lying next to the pool in April. And by that I mean flabby and pale.

Loggins and Messina show how "California Vagina Sailors 2006: Indio" is to be done:

Oh those crazy 'chella rumors

I love this time of year where everyone speculates which bands will perform at the Coachella festival in Indio, CA. I really don't care either way because they always end up having a stellar lineup, so I don't even sweat it. I know that every year towards the end of April or the beginning of May that I will be enjoying myself in California. Anyway, while everyone is guessing, I had a friend tell me a few bands that he heard will be playing (again these are just rumors):

Saturday:
Yo-Yo Ma
The Neil Diamond/Rick Rubin Prog-Orchestra
Ringo Starr's All-Star Band

Sunday:
Prince
Lyle Lovett
Bonnie Raitt

BIG UPS TO MY SIS

I'd just like to send out a warm BDAY wish to my older sister. May she enjoy the iTunes gift certy that I purchased for her, so that her Knotting Hill Soundtrack can finally be bumped from constant rotation. Cheers to being a wonderful sister with (hopefully) a newfound taste in good music (sneeze..celine dion..cough).

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BREA-TCH!!!

(she's the tasty lil number on the left, I'm on the right with the stylish bob,

and we have no idea who those other two are... jk,my cousins)

If you could have anything you wanted for your birthday...

What would it be? Someone posed this question to me the other day and I've still been trying to think of a good answer. Kittens? Porn? A jet? Whirled peas? Feel free to post in the comments section and remember the sky's the limit. It could be anything that crosses your mind. Anyway, thanks to everyone who sent me kind birthday wishes and presents and cupcakes, they were all fantastic.

whatsyerfavoritesongoftheday?

Dana: "Wicked Light Sleeper"- The Joggers
Mere: "Hard to Beat"- Hard-Fi
Rach: "Islands in the Sun"- Weezer
Del: "Islands in the Stream"- Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton

Is Jersey in da house?

Holy crap, look at these mooks. This picture should be the new poster for birth control. Beware of these Jabronis they might be coming to your city via bridge or tunnel.



For more hilarity, please check this.

Happy Birthday Del!

Please join TPM and American Idol's Constantine Maroulis in wishing our main man Del a very happy birthday. We ran into the American Idol heartthrob at Lolita on Friday night and I must say it was quite exciting. For the big day I hear that Constantine will sing a few sultry numbers while Shaps and WiscoD tear each other's clothes off - wait, what? Yeah, you heard me - looks like my friends are having an affair behind my back. Last night we watched the Golden Globes together and the two of them could not keep their hands off each other and I think I saw Shaps shed a tear of joy when Felicity Huffman won an award for her portrayal of a tranny in Transamerica. Have a good day and enjoy that visual!

TPM Birthday Alert!

On January 17th- many many moons ago- a young Del was brought into this world. Legend has it that the little bundle of joy was singing the words to "Love Me Do" and already had an infinite knowledge of all things that rock. Flash forward to 2006-and you've got a seriously good friend and the best boyfriend to my girlfriend anyone could ever ask for. Stay tuned for Meredith's post to Del.

Anywho- the highlight of this weekend for me was doing an endless running man at Orchard Bar with ski goggles on, a trip to Chilis in Jersey City and Upright Citizens Brigade featuring Amy Poehler and her smoking hot husband Will Arnett (aka Gob from Arrested Development). According to IMDB, here are his facts:
Good pal of screenwriter/playwright Dave McLaughlin.
One of Will's first screen roles was in McLaughlin's Southie (1998).
Married to "Saturday Night Live" (1975)'s Amy Poehler.
Speaks fluent French. (HOLLLLERRRR)
Attended French-speaking schools in Toronto.
Does voice-over work for GMC trucks and Lamasil tablets.
Height 6' 2½" (1.89 m)

Here's some pics from Chilis-

the crew- 13 strong, 13 drunk
My contribution to this drawing is the two stick figure gals in the middle- i.e. Rach and me- holding hands with our huge hooters. Rachel is the one on the right with the gimp leg that I later turned into parachute pants.
And what would a chilis excursion be if it didn't end up with a game of "Toss The Quesadilla Into Oveis's Pocket"? You are witnessing the bounce the "dilla took after Beach's wayyyy off the mark shot.

Totes 'N Totes

There comes a time when you have to ask yourself, have I been blogging way too much about a buzz band? Has our adoring, dedicated audience "had it up to HERE" with our over-the-top praise for Minnesotan quartet Tapes 'n Tapes? Are we boring you with our constant adoration? Well, I sure the shit hope not cause now its my turn to gush!!
Last night, I over-the-head clapped so hard at the ProductShop NYC show to both Sam Champion's and TnT's sets, I tuckered myself out and was forced to head straight home after some low impact indie rock aerobics at the Bowery for We Are Scientists. While they totes forgot to give TPM a promised shout out, those hairy/tight panted SC boys melted my face off. The Tapes team jammed out so hard they hurt each other, yesss! Big props to my herterosexual life partner Dana who slow danced with me to "Omaha" and lovingly lent me one ear plug so I am only deaf in one ear today. Dane, for that selfless act, I will lend you one and only one organ. As long as its not a cornea.
Hate to be verbose but seeing as the last time I posted was all the way back in 05, I feel the need to have a little "me time" with our devoted TPM readers. A few current "always the last to know" obsessions:

*Yacht Rock: The (completely untrue) stories behind the creation of the totally smooth music popularized by the likes of my faves Kenny Loggins and Michael McDonald. Adam turned me onto it and now its following has become cult-like at my office. If you like boat shoes (Chrashton!) and fightin words like "California Vagina Sailors" (Chrashton!), then you will love this brilliant online series! Watch em now.


*Chuck Norris Top Thirty Facts: Pretty much the best forward ever, with my #1 being "As a teen Chuck Norris impregnated every nun in a convent tucked away in the hills of Tuscany. Nine months later the nuns gave birth to the 1972 Miami Dolphins, the only undefeated and untied team in professional football history." Oh, and this "Walker Texas Ranger" clip from Conan is equally priceless!

*Futurama on AdultSwim: I never watched it while it was on but I've been giggling a lot at Fry, Leela, Bender and the gang late night. Heard theres a rumor its coming back on ala Family Guy. Hellz yes!

*The Cheesecake Factory: Jay and his crew have Chili's, my vote for TPM's official chain of choice goes to Cheesecake. As I so delicately explained to Mr. Good Times, its not about the dessert, its about the amazing 25 page menu (with ads!) chock full of obnoxiously gigantic appetizers and entrees. Yep, I love me a trough of salad and a platter of pasta. Who's comin with me?

Oh and btw, my song of the day: Private Eyes by Hall & Oates!!

I'm Not Posting, K?

It's Rach's turn to post today and boy will it be funny- i've been given a sneak preview.
In the meantime, I don't want my stellar photos from last night's Productshop NYCshow to go to waste. And when I say stellar, I mean the crappiest live photos ever taken. EVER. PS- to all of you who have seen me on the Productshop page, I promise you I'm not the giant that it portrays me to seem. Though most of you would argue otherwise.

Do I Look Like A Thief?

There is currently a poll going around my office about who is most likely to shop lift and I have the most votes. As far as I know I've never stolen anything from these people or talked about stealing things in front of them. I gotta work on my rep.




On another note, did anyone watch Larry King last night with author James Frey? Apparently their is some controversy swirling around his Oprah Book Club approved memoir "A Million Little Pieces". The Smoking Gun has published an account which says Frey fabricated some of the facts in the book making it more of a fictional account than a memoir. I have read this book as well as his follow-up "My Friend Leonard" and still believe that the basic message of both books is apparent and inspirational. For anyone who has not read either book I highly suggest you do. Afterall, Oprah is an advocate and she is pretty much the most powerful force in the universe. They actually ran over into 360 with Anderson Cooper last night just so Oprah could finish what she had to say. They alter programming for the President and Oprah.

My Left Foot

Sometimes it's like Del's sole purpose in life is to make me happy.

And Wolf Parade's sole purpose is to rock out like the quirky bastards they are. Who knew they had a video for Shine A Light? I didn't!